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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why would a sibling who made the choice to be estranged from another sibling keep sending birthday and holiday cards to their nieces and nephew every year? I can’t make sense of what is going through their mind. If they hate their sibling so much and never want contact again, why keep mailing cards to nieces/nephew who they haven’t seen since they were a baby/toddler/preschooler?  This is also an adult sibling who is in their 40s and his barely held a job as an adult so has very little money and lived with elderly dad. So the $100 sent to each kid is probably significant money to them.  Just trying to make sense of this family situation. [/quote]

He/she are estranged from you, not your kids. Nice of you to throw shade on him/her, though.[/quote]

This is actually not my sibling. It’s a situation with my sister in law and her sibling.

I get her sibling isn’t estranged from her kids, but I don’t get sending gifts to nieces/nephew that don’t even know who you are since the estrangement happened when they were 4 and under. [/quote]

This isn’t complicated. They can still care about the nieces/nephews and some people are generous- I love giving gifts, especially to children in my family. [/quote]

It's creepy to shower people with gifts, especially those with whom you aren't close. You cannot buy love. Even when you are a close family, it's important to check in with parents. Nobody wants their kids becoming spoiled, entitled and focused on material things.  Generosity should be about time and special moments, and again, within what works for the parents. Showering people with stuff is not generous. If a family is poor and you pay for groceries and bills for the month, that is generous. You paid for their needs.[/quote]

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