Reply to sleepover -- how to explain WHY to my child

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is OP. [b]I’m also pissed at the host parents for even issuing the invitation[/b] but I assume they feel like it doesn’t hurt to invite, and then people can say yes or no. They don’t see my daughter crying over and over and over about missing out.[/quote]

Well, there you are out over your skis. The boundaries are: people invite, you get to say no. Your daughter is having a strong reaction to this, but that is not something they are responsible for foreseeing or heading off.

If you have not already talked to your daughter in plain language about sexual abuse, you need to do that.

Given what you have described, the "reason" about sleepovers could be: "It's important to keep your body safe and that includes when you are sleeping, so we do not sleep in the presence of people we don't know extremely well. I don't know these people extremely well, so that is the rule that applies here."[/quote]

This is OP.  I actually disagree.  There are LOTS of jerky invitations that people extend TO THE CHILD FIRST -- like those birthday parties at the American Girl store where you are supposed to bring your own American Girl doll.  You can't bring a stuffie.  The store doesn't allow it.  So if you don't own a doll that costs over $100, you have to borrow one from the library or not attend.  Or having the child over at a playdate and asking the child if they want to watch a PG-13 movie or swim in a pool without the parents around.  Nope.  It's not always ok to invite.  You might tell yourself that, but you're just being lazy.  Talk to the other parents first.[/quote]

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