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[quote=Anonymous]I'm sorry OP. My parents were in an unbelievably selfish phase that resulted in divorce when I was the same age. I really needed them, especially my mom, at the time and they were just too wrapped up in their own dramas to see that. It's such a vulnerable, formative time in your life and I was lucky to have friends (and their parents) who were really loving and there for me. I also told my parents what I thought of their behavior at the time and I've been pigeon-holed as the "outspoken, moody one" ever since. That being said, I know they love me despite their flaws and I am keenly aware and appreciative of that fact and love them back. Like you, I have no interest in ongoing conflict with them.

I've gone on to have a really stable, happy marriage and family. I wear those experiences as a badge of resilience. And I see my parents clearly and made a decision to just take what they can give--this is much more peaceful and productive for me. They have done a lot of good in the world in addition to painfully self-centered things and I try to balance that out in my mind.

I think you're dealing with this really well and have learned how not to be as a parent because of it. The "memoir" sounds ridiculous and it's sad he can't admit mistakes at his age but you already know you can't change him and it's not worth your time, energy and peace to try! Take care OP![/quote]

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