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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Unless there's mental illness, nobody chooses to estrange themselves from family. This is a step people take only as a last resort. There has to be no hope before a person takes steps to cut off their family.

We don't know the back story. What was going on in your family during your childhoods and thereafter?

Only you can answer that question.

Unless your sister wants to see you, I wouldn't make any moves to reach out. That may be very stressful for her. It's stressful enough that she has to accept help from mom.

If you do see her, be kind.

[/quote]

well, I'm about ready to cut my mom off for her manipulative ways. I have no energy for that. And, I cannot believe she drug middle sister into this, considering her husband has about 2 more months to live. 
Our dad left the family when I was 10 for antoher woman and had 3 more kids with her. Mom moved us far away and still, to this day, bristles if any of us has a relationship with him. Dying sister is the closest to him. 
Knowing mom, she's fearful she's losing two family members in one year and is trying to control the situation any way she can. 
She just sent me a message saying she's not manipulative because she's not asking us to do this for her. 
I'm going to reply - then who do you want us  to do this for? us? for dying sister? because, it's still manipulation. [/quote]

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