Reply to parents want to stay in their house "as long as they can" but are no longer safe at home

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have had 4 elders in the family, in their 80s - mid 90s. They, and our family have had good experiences in AL, Dementia care facilities. Many of the staff are extremely devoted. That have made this their life's work. People who work there - why wouldn't they likely be nice-enough people? No reason to scare people - some of us are having good experiences.[/quote]

This. I have seen so much between my parents, inlaws, relatives, grandparents and I think a good AL, Memory Care or if needed Nursing home is a world better than aging at home. The social aspect is the most important IMO, but also the setting. The windows, gardens, bright colored walls, inviting dining room, etc all make a difference too. It's a world different visiting someone in residential facility than it is at their home aging in place and when you see a loved one go from aging at home to residential the difference is massive. My dad still had Alzheimers, but in so many ways it was like he aged backwards-smiling more, interacting with staff and residents, enjoying a new favorite dessert or whatever. He was rotting away at home and could sense my mother's resentment and burnout even with caregivers and programs where she didn't even have to take him to an appointment. A lot of people worry about all the old people and their parents don't want to be with all those old people. They get over it fast and don't even notice "the old people" many of whom are younger than they are![/quote]

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