Reply to 49 and can’t live on own

Forum Index » Adult Children

Reply to "49 and can’t live on own - need solutions"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you have money, there are homes/communities for people who can’t live alone. Sorry I don’t know their names, but there is a good one in Florida.

Perhaps a local Trusts and Estates lawyer would know of options (since old people with only one/a disabled child, also face this challenge.) Good luck to you all. [/quote]

Thank you. Unfortunately, we are limited to the DC area. My parents have asked various professionals (legal, clinical, etc) over the years, [b]and everyone is stumped on a solution.[/b] [/quote]

I'm a psychologist and find this hard to believe. More likely your parents were presented with (less than ideal) options that they rejected but perhaps need to consider again. I would look for either a therapist or "transition to adulthood" specialist who can meet with your family and break it down for your sister: your parents are going to be in a nursing home within a few years and she will need to do all the things in order to live by herself. Along the way, that person can share that if things like working are tough for her there are resources, like disability, supported employment, group homes, that can help, but she has to go through the application process which will include an evaluation. If she refuses, eventually her choices will be things like eviction from their home and living in homeless shelters. Obviously none of this is ideal or easy, but unless you have the desire to bring her into your home, or the resources to fund a never ending string of apartments and personal support workers, it is much better for your sister for you all the face some of the harsh realities of the situation now.

I do live in DC so I don't have any specific professionals to recommend. You might ask on the special needs board. You could also check for resources on NAMI, or maybe Autism Speaks.[/quote]

She seems too old for a transition to adulthood specialist (after reading your message I did some research, seems like these resources are geared toward young adults). Is there a certain type of therapist who would specialize in what you listed above? Thank you.[/quote]

Yes, traditionally transition services happen during teen/young adult years, but the specialist my son sees now has had some older clients who came to her when they couldn't live with elderly parents anymore. Slightly different because your sister sort of "launched" but then just couldn't keep going, but a lot of the skills/resources needed are the same.

You could try contacting this organization:  https://dccil.org/our-services/
They offer transition services for individuals with "significant disabilities" who are at risk of moving from the community to institutionalization. IDK if your sister is the kind of person they are thinking of--"significant disabilities" may mean intellectual disability or physical impairment-- but maybe they could point you in the right direction if they are not the correct fit.

Also, there is this guy:https://www.nextleveltransition.com/
I know nothing about him except his business popped up when I did a search on the Autism Speaks website, and it sounds like he is serving older individuals, too. (and his bio seems pretty good).

As for the kind of professional you need: you need someone with experience with autistic adults. I believe only a psychologist or psychiatrist can diagnose autism (that's how it is in my state), but that doesn't mean someone without those credentials couldn't be great at doing some family therapy or counseling with your sister first to get the ball rolling (like a social worker, family therapist, etc.). Or maybe even that transition guy, who knows.

I suggest you reach out on other social media platforms for other ideas. I have tons of professional connections in my community, but found our transition person by asking in a local Facebook autism group. Just say you are looking for a psychologist or other professional to meet with your family to provide diagnosis, information, and/or support for your middle aged adult sister who is unable to work or live independently due to undiagnosed autism and/or mental illness.

Good luck. Hopefully you will locate some resources soon. Also, you can post in the Special Needs forum on DCUM. I know it says it's for "kids" with special needs, but sometimes people ask for adult resources there. Folks may know of psychologists who do adult evaluations.

[/quote]

OP here. You are so kind, thank you for this very detailed response. It is great guidance, and I so appreciate it. I’ll explore all of these options. Thank you so much!
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics