Reply to Why do some teachers take dads more seriously than moms

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]YEARS of concerns and requests to teachers AND principals? [/b]My kids were in public schools for 12 years and I never spoke to a principal one time. What are you asking for?[/quote]

This is the reason. OP is "that parent". Her husband isn't, at least not yet, because he hasn't been the one voicing concerns and making requests to teachers and principals for years. It has nothing to do with sexism. It has to do with compassion fatigue on the part of overworked teachers.[/quote]

100% this. It’s not female vs male, it’s you vs not you.

Staff talks. When I am invited to a meeting with parents, the history with the family is shared. “Every year mom calls a meeting to complain about something, this year it’s Larlo’s seating arrangement. Just smile and nod, nothing is ever good enough.” Or “mom never agrees to new testing and wants increased accommodations every year, hold firm if she won’t approve testing.”

When dad comes instead, it’s a fresh start. There is no history to share.

Right or wrong, this is reality.[/quote]

So, mom shows up to the IEP or 504 meetings and asks teachers to enforce the required accommodations and then when they don't because mom has a reputation for, OMG, advocating for her child, she has to call in Dad. That's so ridiculous.[/quote]

That’s not at all what I said.

When mom wants to move Larlo into team taught classes and get the district to pay for private reading instruction but refuses reading support elective and the need for updated comprehension and fluency testing (year after year), we don’t bend over.

When mom has signed a stay put order on an IEP from 3rd grade and the child is now in 9th but she refuses to get new data on the kid and wants more one on one instruction despite anecdotal evidence showing it’s not needed, we get tired.

When mom calls in September upset about the book the class is reading, October demanding her child not ever do math on a computer, and November because Larlo can’t be required to sit next to other kids (and the diagnosis is anxiety and the only accommodations listed are extra time and small group testing), forgive us if we don’t get excited when she calls in December to demand a parent meeting with all teachers about the cafeteria seating arrangements.

There is a difference between reasonable and unreasonable. My suspicion is mom has crossed the line into unreasonable.

If I’m wrong and she’s only contacted a teacher a couple times to clarify things or share new info and emails are ignored, I apologize. Then I would guess staff is intimidated by a father. [/quote]

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