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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yeah - I'm not an athlete but I walk a ridiculous amount. My spouse has health issues and is very sedentary. It's frustrating for a couple of reasons - one, I really worry about his health; second, it would be so nice to be able to do things like hike or kayak together. My ex and I were incompatible in so many ways but we both loved to hike and it was such a nice thing to share.

I love my spouse a lot so I try not to fixate on this. Also I saw this same dynamic modeled by my parents (father walks so much and is otherwise active; mother is sedentary by nature and it's exacerbated by health issues). So I sort of see how to live this way compassionately and practically - you need other friends to do activities with, you need to encourage your partner but not nag or berate, etc.

[/quote]

My mom is 66 and my dad is 70. My mom is always doing stuff moving around. my dad on the other hand is always on the couch like a snake. My dad has so many health issues from having lead a sedentary lifestyle.

I really hope many of you ladies aren't going to end up with husbands like my dad. While you are single and dating screen out men who don't exercise regularly. I don't date women who don't exercise regularly. If they don't and are willing to start great. But if they don't see the need for it they can look for another man.[/quote]

I am the PP you're responding to - and it's mixed causation. A lot of being sedentary is because of not feeling well in the first place. Then health issues are exacerbated by being sedentary. Then they become more sedentary because it's uncomfortable not to be. A vicious cycle.

You can't guarantee anyone won't run into a health issue but, yeah, to the extent you have any control - building activity and strength in when you're healthy and able will hopefully build a good foundation as we age.

I did screen out men who didn't exercise regularly. My two most serious relationships before I met the man I married were with someone who ran marathons (and was also a selfish a**) and the ex I mentioned who I liked to hike with (who was a functional alcoholic). My spouse does what he can - and also doesn't do enough - but also he cares for me and considers me in a way that I am so appreciative of. No one is perfect. I'd rather be with my brilliant, caring husband - and deal with his limitations - than with the athlete who made my life an emotional hell for three years, or the alcoholic who loved activity but also didn't have a lot of conversation.

Anyway, just to say: we all make our choices based on a wide variety of factors. [/quote]

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