Reply to Does your doctor seem to care about you at all?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My pcp clearly cares about me to the extent that we create an alliance to address and improve my health. She is very invested in getting me from point a to point b healthwise and has addressed many things my prior PCPs have not. But she's concierge, so I'm paying her for that extra investment. At the end of the day what she cares deeply about is practicing medicine the way it should be practiced; not me in particular.

I think my psychiatrist cares about me a lot as a person because 1) I've been seeing him every month for many years, and 2) we just get along well. But if I were to move away next month or even say I wanted a knew psych, he'd be fine with it. Patients come, patients go.  He'd be really sad as we said goodbye, but then he'd move on to the next patient and that would be that.

Every other doctor I've had has been very interested in my medical issue (but not me personally) at best, and not interested even in my medical issue at worst.

Some of you are expecting too much of a relationship with a busy professional. [/quote]

This seems accurate for my longstanding relationships with my specialists. I do appreciate when they ask about my (young) kids as a starting point for the visit though. [/quote]

Agreed. I think what’s off putting is that some drs don’t seem like they “care” even to the extent of whether they can improve your health issue at all and that’s who I avoid, and others are so robotic and transactional. I recently stopped seeing a longtime pcp who was adequate in medical stuff (not great) because after 10 years he had never initiated even the most banal small talk - weather, holidays, never once asked how I was doing generally or asked about my kids. I know they are super busy but it felt very uncomfortable.[/quote]

I don’t blame you at all. Asking how you are holistically is important and relevant to your overall health. So much of our health relates to our lifestyles, stress levels, habits, etc. and it’s important for a PCP to talk about these things with patients. Patients are also much more likely to share and communicate uncomfortable health issues with a provider whom they feel gives a shit.[/quote]

PP you responded to  - yes, one of the reasons I decided I’d had enough is that I think some drs are just better at navigating this as tough as I’m sure it is. My kids’ pediatrician is very busy and has many patients but remembers my kids, recalls things about them and their health and manages to seem warm and interested although is clearly on a clock and needing to keep moving. That contrast was really evident to me because every time I saw my pcp (maybe 3x a year for 10 years on avg) I wasn’t entirely sure if he remembered who I was or anything about me. [/quote]

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