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General Parenting Discussion
Reply to "Confession - I never had an issue with alcohol before I had kids "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People who are typically "in control" might turn to alcohol to release that control because it provides a temporary escape from the constant pressure of self-regulation, allowing them to relax, let go of inhibitions, and experience a different emotional state, even if it means acting less controlled than usual; essentially, alcohol acts as a way to "switch off" the part of their brain responsible for maintaining strict self-control. The reason you are drinking more with children, a job, and other responsibilities is because you have too many responsibilities. One thing you could do is come back on responsibilities. That’s not realistic for most. The next thing you can do is just recognize that you spend so much of your day being responsible and controlling the emotions you have in order to be responsible that it at some point you need to release. It’s easier to do that with alcohol. It turns off your brain and you are in a way not in control and that feels good. I personally would not try to a psychiatrist and get drugs to replace alcohol. I would work with a psychologist to learn ways to bring down your emotions without alcohol. You can do that by walking in nature, sticking your head in a bowl, full of ice, water, yoga, meditation, Pickleball, running. Seriously when you meet somebody who runs marathons, they’re just somebody with a mental illness. They’re trying to keep under control. Good luck and stopping being so hard on yourself[/quote] Op - omg you read my mind. It makes me so happy that someone else gets it. I am naturally a creative and don’t have the best self regulation. That was fine when I was lower on the totem pole at work and had no kids. But as I got successful and had kids I needed to keep my emotions regulated at all times and it kills me. I don’t think I have much choice about that unless I get a job with others who are less formal or corporate. I have in the past enjoyed jobs in news and politics and creative fields bc they don’t require the same level of emotional regulation. I think this is a huge piece [/quote]
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