Reply to DD wants to bring dullard bf for Christmas

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[quote=Anonymous]We have a similar situation with DD now mid 20s. If I had to choose a word to describe her partner it would be albatross. So the bad news is there is absolutely nothing you can say or do to push her away from the guy. The ONLY thing you can do is act with radical grace and acceptance, even if you don’t feel an ounce of it in your heart. Any criticism or suggestions to slow things down will be taken as an attack and she might cut you off.

As far as not inviting him to every single thing, you’re stuck there too. The old school rules were only a fiancé/fiancée, and then later a live in was also in that category and had to be invited. Unfortunately, we can’t fall back on those rules anymore! Essentially, your daughter has told you that she insist he be invited. So that is definitely what you have to do.

You grit your teeth so that you can continue to have a relationship with your daughter and perhaps future grandchildren. And this is also the only way that she will ever come to you if she recognizes that he’s damaging and wants to leave. I know it’s a better pill to swallow, but that’s it. You have to accept him end of story.

The only time the rules really change is if the partner is like a heroin addict or a sex offender. Then you have to protect the rest of the family. Anything sort of that level we just have to deal with.[/quote]

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