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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There are adult "day care" centers where you can essentially drop off the elderly person for 6 hours per day.

I don't know if they need to meet some physical minimum threshold or what.[/quote]

The daycares do have thresholds. It's good that she doesn't wander, but the fall risk may be an issue. Plus, this may not be a long term solution if she has already had Alzheimers for a while. The break would be amazing, but the reality when she no longer qualifies means she will be even harder to care for at home.

The problem is it's like the living frog placed in boiling water. By the time he realizes how bad it is, it's too late. The decline with Alzheimers is awful and caregivers break. You don't just sign up for Memory Care and end up there tomorrow. These conversations need to be moving forward and places explored. Your health could take turn for the worst from enough stress, ask me how I know. If she has a bad fall and ends up in the hospital, there won't be time to find the perfect facility. The wheels need to be in motion now because you don't want to see how bad this can get and I don't want to post how far it went with my own parents.

Finding people to play cards, getting DH to do more and tiny drops in the bucket. I don't believe in ultimatums, but I do believe in strong advocacy.

Also don't get stuck in this whole I'm a bad person mentality and people posting "No, you are a good person." Good people take care of their mental and physical health and you are struggling now. Don't get sucked into needing other people's approval to create a better situation. Nice people can turn into resentful, burned out and hateful people once things get bad enough. Don't let that happen. Advocate now. This isn't sustainable. Much easier to visit with a smile and love and then go home, then it is to manage all this in your home.[/quote]

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