Reply to I hate Thanksgiving as a parent of kids with SN

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t know if your child has the same diagnoses as mine so this may not be helpful but 5/6 was the absolute hardest. My child is behaviorally unrecognizable now at 9 (with meds! But I think time helped even more). I hope there’s at least a chance that things improve so you have something to hope for.

My child only went for pie today though. They struggle even being around the huge plates of gloppy food. Food is still so hard. [/quote]

NP here. Our child is almost 7 and we are on the brink of hell. ADHD and likely ASD, we will know soon. It feels like everyone has abandoned us; his psychiatrist just shrugs her shoulders why meds aren’t working, his behavioral specialist just quit on us. Our family doesn’t want to be around us. We are just in hell and desperate for help. Crisis center does nothing, police come over and just watch him beat up on us. Hospital tells us we shouldn’t admit a child this young. I would love to hear how things have shaken out for those who have seen some improvement. [/quote]

Oh I hear you. My child was in the process of being kicked out of school when the pandemic hit. They were already in low key crisis and then panicked further when the world shut down. No one cared. My kid couldn’t (still really can’t) participate in anything virtually. Our main provider was still 100 percent virtual 18 months later, after promising they were about to reopen any month now for ages (much like the schools). The whole process totally hardened me and broke me. We did our best (I read every book I could on the diagnoses that were thrown around) but mostly we survived until it was convenient for people to help us again. I am so so bitter. I think our new providers are at least more honest but I don’t trust anyone to care about my kid even 0.1 percent of what I do.

Anyway- if people are blowing you off you need new people. Try not to waste as much energy being bitter as I have just fire them right away and find new people. If you have money throw $ at private pay everything. It’s criminal that’s what you have to do but just do it if you can. In the meantime, just survive. The only really good thing I did was try really hard, every day even when I really didn’t want to, to find connection to my kid. Lots of verbalizing specifically things I love about them, finding things we could do together and be happy, even for a few minutes here and there. It helped us both. Anyway good luck, I really do wish you the best.

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