Reply to Need advice - Is this bullying at the bus stop?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]Let me ask you then. What would be your plan -- from the perspective of the smaller, younger child -- to fix this? How does the younger, smaller child "fix" this situation short of giving up all rights to get on the bus first and simply allowing the older stronger child to have complete domination over the situation? Is that your vision of "fixing" the situation? Because we could all figure that one out. That's not a fix. That's letting the bully win.

So, if you have a plan, let us know how it would work. [/quote]

I would suggest, as I said before, that the younger child use humor to deal with it. "After you!" And "complete domination"? Just to let someone else go first to get on a bus? I rode a middle school bus where there weren't even enough seats for everyone and at least a dozen children stood in the aisle. As long as you get on the bus, be satisfied. This is not a slippery slope issue. I think the term bully is over-used greatly, and that kids would do better in life if they had to work some things out themselves. Even if the 4th grader rallied all the other non-sixth graders and confronted the 6th graders and got them to agree that they'd switch weeks - one week it would be the 4th graders turn to get on first and the next it'd be the 6th graders turn to get on first - I'd be happy with that. My issue though, is that the kids should work it out themselves - a fourth grader should not have their mommy solving their interpersonal squabbles with peers for them unless it's serious, which this is not. Serious would be a sixth grader holding a BB gun to the 4th grader's head, or waving around a broken bottle threatening to cut them. [/quote]

Agree.  Bullying would be if the 6th graders are banding together to taunt the other child, making fun of her, throwing paperwads at her and getting the other kids on the bus to snub/ignore her.  Pushing to the front of the line at that age is just one of those dynamics that kids need to learn to navigate.  We are not talking about a 5 year old here.  We are talking about a 10 year old preteen and a 12 year old preteen.[/quote]

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