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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When women actually are avoidant, how do they feel and behave?[/quote]

I always find something wrong with a "candidate": too sensitive to music or not sensitive at all; too intense or not enough intensity; smokes; appears stingy; screamed when my cat jumped on his lap; didn't bring a bottle to dinner; didn't hold my hand when I felt emotional proximity; subtle signs of him seeing others. Anyway, each time with each man something seems to be wrong or stressful so I have an urge to run. I cannot even understand if it's me or them at this point. I live alone and prefer it that way. Sometimes I date but get bored with all the men very quickly and just ghost them or tell my old BF is back; or I am moving to a new city.

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Is your old BF really back?  I assume you aren't really moving to a new city.[/quote]

Of course not. I never call back old BFs. I have several contacts in my Signal I have sexual exchanges and my toys. But my last relationship was a year ago, and I’m hopeful that I can still feel secure and committed if I meet the right person.
But yes, the very fact of men dating around,  describing their past dating history pushes me away. As if he has a label after he shared.

Full commitment from the start and not being promiscuous and truly sincere is attractive to me. But it takes a lot of time to earn my trust. [/quote]

How can someone be fully committed at the start? They don’t even know you! You sound exhausting, and I say that as a woman.[/quote]

I mean committed to his words (says he’ll call and he does call on time); behaviorally attuned  (if he says he’s excited he actually behaves excited). [/quote]

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