Reply to Helping neighbor kids onto morning bus

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Who are all you hair-trigger people?!

I have always walked or driven my kids to school, but I would not feel put-upon in the least if another parent checked-in every morning. Just send a thumbs up. If you don't go to the bus stop one day, just respond "wasn't there today".

No need to make a grand gesture!!! One day you might need a neighbor's goodwill. I sure did a few times, when I had health issues and needed my neighbors and friends to pick my kids up from school and get them to their activities. What comes around goes around. Replying to a text is such a small gesture you can do for another human being.

I mean really, are you so easily irritated by non-events?!? No wonder this country is so divided on everything, and has a massive panic attack on every single societal concept.

Seriously, chill.

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I might have thought this before my neighbor did it to me, but it actually gets to be a lot. For someone where you have a reciprocal relationship of close friends? Cool. For someone who is a casual acquaintance where you suddenly feel responsible for their kid? You can't chill about someone else's kid.[/quote]
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This is the part that you don't seem to get. All the parent is asking is whether the kid got on the bus. It's a yes or no. [/b]

Insofar as you are a parent at a bus stop full of kids, you are not more responsible for this kid than any other unaccompanied kid at the bus stop. Personally, I feel equally responsible - in a non-stressful, motherly sort of way - for ALL the kids at the bus stop. So do the other parents at the bus stop. We're all looking out for every kid. It's not a burden at all.

So yes, I can completely chill out at the bus stop. I bring my dog. I chit chat. I keep an eye out. At times I've told the driver to stop, there's a kid running towards us who's late. Nothing about this is stressful.

And you don't seem to understand that favors don't need to be returned instantly. You are building a community. Some of my neighbors who casually employed my tweens/teens for yard work, snow removal and dog sitting were then more than happy to act as references for their college jobs. Stop looking at this in an immediate transactional way. The support you get from your community may take years to come to fruition, but it may be valuable nonetheless.
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If that's really all it is, maybe it's fine. Most posters are reading it the way I did - that it's more of a "can you help my kids and make sure they make it," which is not a simple yes or no.[/quote]

That’s a bizarre take when it’s literally just “did they make it onto the bus” unless you’re holding their hands and handing a backpack to them you’re not helping in any way.[/quote]

I see it both ways. I don't think the other mom expect OP to help her kid get on the bus (the kid is old enough to do it herself). OP doesnt' technically have to do anything.

But the fact that OP gets this text daily is creating an obligation for OP to pay attention to this child and confirm she got on so she can report back to the mom. I do think this would start to wear on me because I am a fairly vigilant person and if you assign me the task of making sure a kid got on the bus then my brain will make this a task I have to do and I'll be thinking about it before I even get to the bus stop. And then looking for her and then watching her get on and then anticipating the text so I can report. Even if I don't want it to this will become a daily task for me and even though it's a very easy task it would take up mental space and I'd start to wonder why I now have this responsibility.

Like if OP doesn't pay attention to the kid or doesn't text back promptly will the other mom be upset -- that's the real test. The fact that she texts every single day makes it seem like she's relying on OP for this and at some point she needs to stop.[/quote]

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