Reply to And the woman of my dreams just ruined it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She didn’t ruin anything. She’s a real human, not the imaginary woman of your dreams.  [/quote]

This.
Your rhetoric either informs your thinking…or reveals it.

And your rhetoric, OP, is a red flag. When you use language that puts the blame on [i]her[/i] for [i]your[/i] feelings (I.e., “SHE ruined it” rather than “my attraction for her is now not as strong due to [i]my own[/i] biases and perception of flirtation”) then you are failing to recognize that she isn’t actually responsible for your reactions or interpretations of certain behaviors. You need to own that.
She is who she is and you either like her or you don’t. But SHE didn’t “ruin” YOUR attraction.
You simply made a judgment about her behavior that resulted in you no longer being attracted to her based on a standard that YOU chose to elevate above her other numerous qualities that you do admire.
And that’s fine.
But you need to own that you did that.
She didn’t do anything to “ruin” anything.[/quote]

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