Reply to Spouse makes broad personal attacks

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm the original poster.  Been in a relationship with my spouse for over 15 years.  I have never, and would never, hurt or intimidate my spouse or kids in any way.  The thought is repulsive and absurd.

I included the points in my post because I wanted to underscore how irrational my spouse was behaving.  My spouse had just finished watching the Lacey Peterson documentary on Netflix and just used the "D" word with me for the first time, and was afraid I was going to suddenly turn into some kind of Scott Peterson.  It was totally crazy and had no basis in reality.[/quote]

^ there it is. Your spouse tells you how they feel and you call them crazy, irrational, and they have no basis in reality. You are denying their FEELING as if they don't FEEL them.

You are blaming your spouse for their feelings, and denying it could ever be. But you've admitted you are big and intimidating. What do you see here about your behavior vs what you are saying?

"When I'm in full parenting mode, I tend to project a large physical presence and also have a deep authoritative voice. DS appears to dislike this very much..."

Since spouse doesn't like this, why do you keep doing it? Have you discussed it outside of the moment?

You also mention you have cancer and have no energy. Is your spouse afraid of you dying? Have you talked about that?

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