Reply to How do you help your children's significant others feel like part of the family?

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[quote=Anonymous]I'll mention a few things not to do.

Have your child's fiance (weeks before the wedding) join for his first Christmas and make a big deal in front of everyone how is name is written on masking tape on his stocking and can easily be ripped off

In my case - married for almost 10 years and we spend most Christmases with his family. 3 years ago everyone else got thoughtful presents and I got a a few boxes of junk from the garage wrapped up to feel hefty and give the appearance of the weigh of a gift only my actual gift was cash ranging from $5 to $20. $40 in total. The excuse was they didn't know what to get me. Embarrassing as everyone else opened real gifts and the first thing I opened was string lights that I was actually appreciative for. Come to find nope the $5 in the box was my gift.

This was when we were first married - going to the store and buying knickknacks for DH and SIL and then making a big deal of you going in a separate line to purchase a $6 item. I grew up in a family ( not great but also not cheap) where if my mom bought me something she bought the same for sil.

Hosting Christmas and then sending a Venmo for groceries but only to DH and I. Before SIL was married.

When BIL called to tell in laws he was proposing to SIL.  In laws first reaction was I guess it's a race to see who has the darkest grandchild. [/quote]

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