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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH and I are both from Colorado originally (different sides of the state) and met while working in DC.  When we got married, we lived in the city for a few years, then moved to the suburbs when we had kids.  When we were young, we frequently talked and dreamed of being able to move back home.  Fast forward 15 years, DH just retired (he's a few years older than me) and now earns a small pension.  I work as a teacher.  Between his pension and my salary we have no money issues -- we bought our house about five years ago with a very low interest rate.

Now that he's retired, DH has been reminding us of our original dream which he has been exaggerating as a "pledge" to move back to Colorado to be closer to friends and family.  However, I've changed my mind since then for several reasons including:

1. Our kids' lives and friends are now here - it's the only place they've known
2. I love my teaching job here, and would probably need to get certified to teach in Colorado
3. Living next to family and friends back home is not all it's cracked up to be 
4. I've made good friends in the community here and don't want to start over

DH has unfortunately not invested in making friends locally.  He's a friendly guy to everyone, but says he already has his lifelong friends back home and doesn't want to do that again at his age.

DH has explained that if we sell our house in the current market here, we could use the proceeds to buy our next house in Colorado in cash, and that his pension and investment income would then cover our costs of living so that neither of us would have to work.  This isn't resonating with me though, mainly because of the kids.  However he isn't letting it go, and I see him online at nights looking at properties back home.

I understand that our old dreams 15 years ago meant something then, but our lives change and evolve, and DH still seems fixated on the original plan.  What can I do?  Am I the @$$hole for changing? [/quote]

I recently visited the area again after moving and was floored that I had this realization that it's pretty perfect if you can afford it there. I asked myself why did we move??? Colorado is nice, we visit during the winters but it is nothing like living in NOVA. Maybe you will change your mind while you are retired though. [/quote]

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