Reply to At what point do you or will you make your kids leave home

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Seems so many kids live at home into their mid twenties if not longer.

How do you decide to let your adult stay at home, or move back home, and what factors are part of your decision? Are you genuinely happy about or okay with it? Do you feel it is a part of parenting responsibility? What type of boundaries (if any) factor into your decision?

I'm struggling with this somewhat and curious on perspectives and how people justify their paths and what seems to be an extra 10 years of immediate vicinity parenting like relationship continuance. My mindset needs help.[/quote]

It somewhat depends on the child. For our first child, we suggested they move in for a year after college as their job was within commuting distance.  This was with the understanding that they would max their company’s 401k and save monthly what they would have paid if they lived on their own.  We thought that way they would have a year to save up a good nest egg and figure out heir social life and work life and be able to target an area to live.  They graduated from college in Dec. 2019 and started their job at the end of January 2020.  It turned out to be the best thing as they were not stuck alone in an apartment 24/7.  They ended up staying 2 1/2 years due to Covid.  They saved enough for a nice down payment when they decide to buy.  They have been in their own apartment for 2 years now.

Our second child has had some spits and starts.  They were greatly affected by Covid in college and took a year after undergrad to apply to graduate schools. They spent a year in grad school and it was just not working out so they moved home again.  They are now looking for a job.  If they find one within a commutable distance, they will probably live at home for a bit too.  Their mix of strengths and weaknesses makes it more complicated than their sibling.

Both have challenges that generally mean a longer launch period. [/quote]

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