Reply to Everyone who loves their old parent is so lucky

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]To the poster above, here's the thing:  There's this commercial that's popular in my area of the country for some kind of nursing assistance program in your home, and it concludes with this line "She has done so much for me.  Now it's my turn to give back"  and it makes me so mad!!!
A lot of us are now in the position where are being asked to mother and nurture someone who never mothered and nurtured us, someone who perhaps shouted at us and shamed us when we spilled something as children, when we tore a shirt while playing too roughly on the playground, when we came home from school with paint on our clothing from art class, when we lost a library book, etc.  We are now being asked to exhibit patience and love, to be forgiving and kind to people who were not forgiving and kind to us.  To literally feed an old lady who neglected to feed us as children, to make sure that she has warm clothes in the winter and cool clothes in the summer when she didn't do that for us.  Even if you THINK you are over all the trauma, even if you think you have worked through it all with the aid of a professional, etc.  this particular stage o life brings it home in a new and painful way.  As my abusive father was dying, he literally asked us "Am I a good person?"  He was afraid he was going to go to hell and wanted us to assure him that he was an awesome dude, even though he wasn't.  Unless you have experienced this, you don't get to judge. [/quote]

Op here- wow. What an impactful post. What did you do and say when your dad asked you that?!? That is a very stark image. I would be tempted to lie but I am soft hearted![/quote]

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