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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think a lot of people think that the longevity of the marriage has inherent value in itself and that by making it through the “tough times” until they were content in old age they have won the race.  I see one or two posters here in particular who make the argument a lot.

I think this is a comforting story we tell ourselves in a long marriage.  The truth is that if I had left my husband during a difficult period I may well have turned out happier and healthier.  [b]I see women who were married for 40, 50 years and they look so worn down and miserable.  My divorced mother and never married aunt look vibrant and happy and young by comparison.[/b]

That said I really love my husband, even on our absolute worst days, and I plan on staying with him until one of us dies.  If I didn’t love him I wouldn’t stay with him and I wouldn’t feel particularly bad about it.  And I don’t think anyone should feel bad about leaving a bad marriage.[/quote]

This is interesting and I’ve noticed the same thing. Freeing to let yourself out of cultural narratives.[/quote]

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