Reply to Are there ramifications for being a SAHM?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do what you want and what feels good for you in your relationship.

I always liked working. I derive satisfaction from working. I didn't derive much satisfaction from being a full time mom (which I essentially did for 3 years - though always was technically employed at the time, for purposes of keeping my resume fresh).

I hear a lot of women on this forum say that their husbands always continued to treat them as the same equal when they stayed home.  That's great! [b]In my case, I don't think I'd ever be attracted to the kind of guy who had the same respect for a sahm wife as he would have for a working wife. [/b]Because honestly that means he probably didn't put a whole lot of value in the accomplishments of a working wife. I have accomplished a lot in my career and education. It really is harder and more interesting than baby raising. So if a guy was like "my opinions of you won't change based on whether you continue working or not"..... . that's kind of weird, and not the guy for me.  Consequently, my DH is very attracted to my professional success; we definitely weren't as connected or have the same energy when I wasn't working. But again - your DH and your relationship may be different, so you do you. [/quote]

This is sad to me and I have a career. It’s sad for a few reasons including that you’re likely over the age of 35 and still think your career is that important in the grand scheme of things. I work for a few reasons but primarily for income and can’t imagine my DH thinking me pushing papers around and sending emails is really more important than my role raising children. This view also diminishes what has traditionally been a woman’s job since the beginning of time. It suggests that the only way you add value is if you have what was traditionally a man’s job. Bringing a life into this world and raising it isn’t enough for you. Instead you need to work for a corporation and send emails. Kind of gross. I think our nanny’s job is incredibly important and don’t think my job is more important or better than being the mother to my children. 
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You’re vomiting over a woman valuing raising kids as much as her job?[/quote]

I think pp is vomiting because the above indicates that this person does not have the skills for high paying job so she has to disregard those that do to make herself feel better. [/quote]

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