Reply to I feel terrible about how burned out I am on childcare

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The idea of the “parent as child concierge” is very new, maybe 1990s. It is pretty damn annoying and it’s ok to acknowledge that.
[/quote]

I’m the SAHM and I actually don’t think it’s that. It’s not that we’re doing things for them all day long. Just doing the things, in a quiet beach house, would be pretty relaxing. It’s the respectful interaction all day long. Some parents in previous generations set up barriers for when their kids couldn’t interact with them, and sometimes they enforced that by yelling. We tend to respond respectfully to our kids all the time, which is exhausting because they are exhausting. It helps if you detatch a little, and it helps if you set firm boundaries for them about things like whining and pestering. My best approach to that is just to CALMLY ignore and say “I can’t hear you when you’re whining” or whatever. But you need to say it without getting upset.

They just do 20,000 things all day long that are super irritating. Superimpose their behaviors on an adult and you can see how you’d think the adult was insanely annoying. In a ten minute car ride yesterday my three year old:
1) asked to have her windows down in the 100 degree heat 
2) repeated, poorly, my explanation oft why the driver gets to decide about the windows
3) counted, poorly, to 16 to show how old you have to be to get a drivers license 
4) took her shoes off and asked for help getting them back
5) asked about snacks 
6) asked for a toy we didn’t have with us 
7) worried aloud that I had driven through a yellow light 
8) requested really terrible music and sang along

So that’s an angel child on a lovely outing. Amazing three year old behavior, five stars. But if an adult coworker did all of that on a 10 minute car ride, you would tell everyone you saw that day how insane and annoying they are. [/quote]

This really made me giggle. I have a 4 year old and yeah, they’re wild 😂[/quote]

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