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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The modern conception of a marriage partner is a LOT.  We've built up the expectation that this person needs to be

Financially successful / ambitious
But still present around the house
Best friend
Lover
Housekeeper
Near perfect mental health 
Always expected to put their hands wants/needs behind yours/household

There aren't going to be many men fitting this bill
[/quote]

Not really. If women can do all of this, so can men.

I met my dh in college (we were seniors) and we both knew. Sometimes you just see yourself reflected in another. I couldn’t have asked for a better husband. Maybe it was luck? Dh and I were always more responsible and knew what we wanted in life. Our peers weren’t the same when we were in our 20s. [/quote]

DP - I think it's a fair point that we expect marriage to be ALL the things that it has been over decades, but now at the same time. Western marriage grew up as a contract between families, made with an eye toward the material support of multiple generations (elders, adults, and kids) using resources from both sides. Today we want marriage to provide materially for the family, but mostly through the labor of two people - and it should also provide romantic and sexual love, and friendship, and the kinds of child rearing and housekeeping duties that used to be provided by a communal group and/or live-in help. I'm not saying it can't be done - people are doing it - but that's a long shopping list to manage when you are dating in your 20s.[/quote]

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