Reply to Mom says she’d rather live in the streets than nursing home

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[quote=Anonymous]There are no good options. If they stay at home there’s almost no way to keep up with their care or their caregivers. They’re a nuisance to neighbors (“I saw your mom walking outside in a t-shirt and underwear in the middle of winter.”) they knock on random doors, burn stuff, and call you a million times a day. They call the morning of a doctor’s appointment and say they don’t feel well enough to go. They forget everything, can’t follow instructions, and change their minds about things it takes you forever to figure out. But they’re in the own home, with the things and foods they like, and can watch whatever they want on tv.

At a facility, they can sit in dirty diapers for hours on end, and basically just aren’t treated that kindly. And every place is always understaffed so some basic needs go unmet. The food is usually not great, and they don’t get to eat all the stuff they like and are used to. Imagine eating institutional meals for the rest of your life. But some people do socialize and sort of make friends. And strangely enough, locked memory care units are almost better. They let them wander as much as they want (dementia patients seemed programmed to do that) and a lot of them are physically healthier than non-dementia patients.

Honestly, the only good scenario is to be super rich with close family who doesn’t mind helping with your care. [/quote]

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