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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

But I do believe, supported by both evidence from my own life, observation of others, and psychological studies, that people do best in life when they feel comfortable in their own skin, accepted and loved by their support system, and feel like they have agency in they own lives. Is this the way to make an investment banker? Probably not, no. But if you can love and support your kids, provide firm boundaries and guidance, and allow them independence to be their own people, I think you have the best shot at them becoming adults who will be able to set and achieve their goals (or recalibrate when necessary in the face of failure, instead of melting down).[/quote]

Seriously, who wants to raise an investment banker?   But accepted and loved and comfortable in their own skin is important.  That’s easy if they never leave the house.   The negative forces out there start to wear some people down.   Maybe your child wants to be a farmer but he’s in a school full of investment banker wannabes who ridicule his dream every day.  Or the kid that’s a little odd looking but is or was happy until no one would play with her because she was “scary” looking.  The constant cruelty is like a daily war.

Sometimes it’s not the parents fault their child isn’t doing well.  Sometimes it’s the hurt and nastiness of people out in the world that pick the life out of them.  [/quote]

DP here.  If my kid wanted to be an investment banker, or a farmer, or anything in between. I would be incredibly proud of them.  It is not my life. It is not my neighbor's life.  It is not my frenemy's life.  It is the kid's life.  Point blank.  Nothing will change that it is not anyone else's life but theirs. Nothing. Ever. [/quote]

Too many people use careers that bring in a lot of money as signs of success or winners.  You know there’s a lot of pushing to be something that the parents want and too many think their kids want the same life they grew up in.  Maybe, maybe not. [/quote]

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