Reply to DD is giving me the silent treatment

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sorry off-topic... but I have never heard silent treatment referred to as abuse.... thank you so much to the posters saying it. This is a lightbulb moment for me. My mother would (and still does!) give me silent treatment and it makes me feel shaky and terrified....and she acts like she's doing nothing wrong. It absolutely is horrible and abusive. I just appreciate you guys for saying this. I feel stronger and more empowered and less gaslit now. Thank you!!! Sorry didn't mean to derail.[/quote]

My DH went through the same thing, realizing his mom giving him the silent treatment was and is abusive and it’s really helped him to unravel some of his issues. I’m glad you are recognizing it for what it is; manipulative and abusive. Such a cruel thing to do to a child, especially[/quote]

Yes! My mom has done this to me my entire life. Days, weeks, months of not talking and then she would talk to me or call me out of the blue and pretend everything was normal. I took this abuse for 29 years and then I stopped. What did it for me was my then boyfriend now husband being appalled that my mom stopped talking to me for four months because I didn’t tell her before I RSVP’d “no” to my cousins wedding (we are not close and it was on a small island in Canada with complicated logistics and I had just started a new job). I didn’t think I needed to clear my RSVP with my mom but she was apoplectic. Why? My sister also didn’t want to go and my mom thought that I would go and be her emotional punching bag for the weekend because she hates her siblings. So of course it made sense that she stopped talking to me for four months.

We have a very strained relationship now. She is barely in my life of my kids lives. It is sad but it is not something she wants to self reflect on and I can’t play her games. [/quote]

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