Reply to Evaluating trying for a second child when only child is known to have high needs

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[quote=Anonymous]We have one kid with ASD1 who is 5yo. She is doing really well now, though there was a period between age 2 and 4 that was really hard.

DH knew early on, before DD was born that he probably wouldn't want another. I was more interested in having 2 and definitely wanted another right after DD was born (probably somewhat hormone driven). I eventually accepted that since DH didn't want another and I have fertility issues, that another kid is not in the cards for us.

Now that DD has her ASD diagnosis I realize both DH and I may have some ND traits. Definitely both have issues with executive functioning and anxiety. And that helps me realize that while other families may do fine with 2 kids, we probably would not. Having a young child has been hard on our marriage. I get overwhelmed easily and DH shuts down. Not a good combo. It is so much better now that DD is older, and I think another baby would just be really hard. I have learned to appreciate what we have and stop feeling like we "should" have had another.[/quote]

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