Reply to How to come to terms with extrovert ILs who expect constant conversation

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This isn’t an extrovert vs introvert thing. By framing it this way you are ignoring that the grandparents are being rude and obnoxious.

Demanding 24/7 constant interaction and then rudely scolding anyone who takes a break is not extroversion! It’s anxiety driven or narcissism or just demanding rude behavior. I’m an extrovert and this would drive me nuts too!

1. Do not encourage , enable or give power to this crap. Entertain and visit with them but if they balk when anyone goes to the bathroom or needs to do something, tell them point blank to stop it. If you scurry back over to them, they learn this works.

2. Do not worry for one second that they will be upset or offended for you calling them out on their behavior. They are being rude and obnoxious! A reoccurring pattern on this board is people wanting to find a polite, soft way to get jerks to stop being jerks. It doesn’t work this way people! [/quote]

Agree. if this is truly the dynamic at hand.

My FIL is in the autism spectrum and quite “out of it” if not at his home. What worked when the kids were 2 yos does not work at age 10.
Thanksgiving week (at our house) he forced our 8 yo to play Uno with him for 4 hours, and she did. He’d follow both kids around the house from 2 feet behind them. He asked where they were to everyone, all the time. 
Same thing happened Tuesday, he tried to get either kid to “play” with him all day. My spouse, the son, hid in his home office both days. 
By the time I came back from work Tuesday my 8 yo was DONE. She told me she can’t do it any longer. That’s when I learned what was happening from 8am to 5pm. 
After two days of that my kids stayed in their rooms way more. Exhausted.

Some people just cannot read the room. Parents need to step in and say Downtime is fine.

For the rest of the week FIL busted out his iPad and read old country news for hours and we made him decorate two outdoor trees with 1000ft of lights each. [/quote]

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