Reply to Alcohol use and aging, ill dad

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]
[b]Taking Action[/b]
If you know an older alcoholic, take action to help yourself and the alcoholic. You can seek help from an alcoholism counselor or Al-Anon to cope with your feelings. You can begin allowing the alcoholic to suffer the consequences of his/her drinking. A competent professional can use resulting crises to break through defensive behaviors and help the older person realize his/her problem.

You need to be supportive of the older alcoholic without enabling her/his drinking to continue. Try to convey these beliefs to the older alcoholic:

You believe in the strengths and potential of the older person.
You are hopeful that the person can recover.
You care about the person and want him/her to receive help.
You will be nonjudgmental about the person's alcohol abuse but no longer supportive of its consequences.
You will learn about the disease and encourage the older person to do so.

[b]Finding Help[/b]
For the older alcoholic, you can seek help from a community resource person to refer the alcoholic to appropriate care.[/quote]

https://seniornavigator.org/article/12411/alcoholism-and-older-adult

That he is doing well and that anyone is considering enabling him to actively drink (think it's just you and step mom?) shows a lot of sickness in the family system. It's not love. Would you buy him cocaine with his physical health issues?

I think you have a LOT of denial yourself, OP. Not just about your dad but about how unhealthy patterns and dynamics in the family have shaped you and continue to control your thinking, re: dad and step mom and inevitably in other areas of your life. You say everyone else is opposed.

Use this as a wake up call and begin to gain self awareness. Do you tend to be a people pleaser? Driven to "keep the peace?" etc., etc.

Why is an intervention off the table and enabling his addiction the choice being considered instead? [/quote]

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