Reply to New girlfriend is blocking access to my best friend

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a big issue. My once-boyfriend but now longtime best friend is dating someone new. He and I had dated for 2 years, but broke up over his drug use and mood swings (he went to rehab after we broke up). We’ve been best friends over the past several years, and generally talk multiple times a day. I’m married and my spouse is fine with this.

My friend started dating a new woman 2 months ago who determined that I am a threat, and accused him of planning on cheating on her with me. Apparently there was some drama surrounding hanging out with her ex-boyfriend as well. She and I are completely different. She does recreational drugs, parties, goes to concerts/music festivals, while I don’t drink, use drugs, or party. There’s no way either my friend or I would cheat.

Apparently she went through his text messages (there were texts I sent to him telling him to break up with her because she is a bad influence), and is claiming she will break up with him if he talks to me again. Apparently they have been having fights relating to trust (yet they’ve only been dating for 2 months).

We also work on a side activity together, which we’ve worked together on for years. His sudden departure from our team left me with challenges for overseeing that activity. I know he was really proud to be involved (was showing her our successes on an early date).

FWIW, I’m way more attractive than she is and have known him for years so I guess she sees me as a threat. But I want my best friend back and am not willing to go no contact with him. Advice?[/quote]

OP, if I were you’d I’d maybe reflect on why you just spent most of this post, to entire strangers, explaining why you’re so much better for him than she is. You don’t drink, you’re more attractive, etc.

You’re married. Let him find love or break up your own marriage to chase this train. But you don’t get both.

I’m assuming part of the reason your husband doesn’t mind this guy when his GF hates you, is that friend has never sent text messages telling you to break up with your DH. [/quote]

I surmise that OP has likely not told her DH all the specifics and details - things 'conveniently' left out.  I'm guessing this was framed to her DH as a completely innocent, very casual connection to an 'old' ex.  I am guessing that if DH knew the full truth and the extent and depth of OP's connection to her ex-BF, her DH would not be perfectly ok with it.  but that's just me and my $0.02[/quote]

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