Reply to Mom always wants us to help her out with her work event when we visit

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There s a big difference between helping out with personal tasks (which you absolutely should do for a parent) versus helping someone perform their job. Her employer is taking advantage of her and by extension, you, even if unintentionally. [/quote]

OP here, this sums up how I feel. If she was asking us to go to the grocery store or Target to pick up a few things, it wouldn't be a problem. Similarly, if my Mom was running a restaurant that she started from the ground up, that would be different too. But she's working for a mid-sized university (one that a majority of people on this board have heard of), and while she's not at the top of the food chain in her department, she's not at the bottom either; it's frustrating that she can't stick her neck out, and try to get some college kid to help set up name tags, instead of using her kids who are in town for a short time for free labor, or ask a co-workers, "hey Donna, my kids are in town this weekend, can you help with the set up for the Baxter lecture instead?" [/quote]

I still don’t get it. You feel like her employer is taking advantage of her? I’m not saying you’re wrong, but hours need to say more to help us understand. I assume she has a job to do that includes x number of tasks, including setting out nametags and picking up catering. If the Baxter event falls on the weekend when you’re visiting, she still has to do all of the tasks. I don’t see how her employer is taking advantage of her to expect her to get those things done. Her workload doesn’t decrease just because you’re in town.

I need you to say more about how you see this differently from me.[/quote]

This. Your helping means you get to spend more time together, because otherwise, she will be doing that stuff by herself.  [/quote]

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