Reply to Worried about freeloader sibling when parents pass

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]100% the parents’ fault for not seeking a diagnosis for their child when treatment could have made a difference.

All of these failures to launch have mental health issues, probably some form of autism and the accompanying anxiety/OCD/ADHD/health issues that are so often comorbid.

I’ve worked SO hard with my oldest, who has ASD/ADHD/OCD to hoist him into college. Then we’ll have to hoist him into a job. Our goal is financial independence for him, so he’s not a burden on his siblings. All my kids are well aware of this goal. My son himself understands he needs to support himself - even though every day tasks are hard for him.

You are a victim, but don’t forget the failures are victims too. They were never given a chance.[/quote]

This is the truth. But I don't know what the solution is for the OP at this point.[/quote]

It’s nowhere near the situation OP is in, but my family has a very similar dynamic that would probably be a lot more similar to OPs situation had my youngest sibling not had a few  obvious psychiatric breakdowns in her late teens/early 20s and got professional help.

I’d say have a discussion with your brother so you are on the same page, and make it clear to your parents you cannot take care of your sister - because it would be unfair to all of you.  Hopefully they have enough money to set her up with a trust and a non-family member trustee.  That sanity is worth not having an inheritance or having less of one.  Yea, it’s “unfair” but it’s also unfair that some people get 10 million dollar trust funds and other people have to support several elderly family members.  [/quote]

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