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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had one as well but it flared up to a level that was untenable, they are missed terribly.  The mistakes I made in the beginning by not drawing proper boundaries around our relationship caused its implosion. There was also some deception on my part with my primary which poisoned the entire thing from the start.  I don’t foresee us ever reconnecting but if I am so lucky I would do everything in my power to do it right.

What you have sounds good, do you find yourself less likely to emotionally extend yourself with your husband? There has to be some cost to your primary relationship.[/quote]

DH is actually more than happy not to be my primary emotional caregiver! Less work for him and more sex to boot.[/quote]

Sort of like bringing a date to a comedy show, she laughs her ass off associates it with him and he gets laid despite doing none of the work. 
Interesting

This feels a little vacant, having my spouse maintain a deeply intimate loving relationship with someone else while leaving me with nothing more than her physical body in the living room doesn’t sit well with me.

Would you describe your marriage as fulfilling? Do you do nice things for each other, laugh, take trips, plan vacations and fun stuff in the future? 
Do you and your husband find yourself at times clicking so well and enjoying each other so thoroughly that the need to be physical just takes hold of both of you? What I am imagining is you compartmentalizing and carrying on the real parts of love with your penpal and keeping your husband around for a reliable erection.

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