Reply to Marriage not great-taking 5 day trip with DH to work on it

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Marriage not great-taking 5 day trip with DH to work on it"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]Hi OP, I could have written your post, except my kids are a few years older. My DH has extremely terrible anxiety that makes him almost nonfunctioning. He rarely leaves the house (also wfh), doesnt talk to anyone when he does leave the house, does the bare minimum at home, we haven’t had sex in years, it sucks.

We tried working on it on our own. We tried marriage counseling, now we are divorcing. I can’t imagine not only spending the rest of my life feeling unloved and unwanted and unappreciated and generally always angry, but I also don’t want my kids to think this is the norm for a marriage/life.

I believe my husband also suffers from low t and depression, in addition to anxiety, but I cant make him be honest with his doctors/therapist and I cant make him do what he should be doing to help his anxiety. I tried for years to make it better for him but he isnt helping himself or being honest with himself. Or his doctors. There is nothing else I can do.

I get where you are coming from re worrying about the kids when they are with him without me, but he does love his kids and is ok w a routine. He can get them out the door in the morning to school, feed them dinner at night and get them to bed. Will their teeth always be brushed, will they always get baths, will they always eat a vegetable? No. Will they spend their weekends doing more than screentime (outside of planned activities like sports)? Also no. Will I always be the one doing all appointments, activity scheduling, school appointments, etc.? Yes. But I accept it. They are my kids and I love them and our life isnt what I envisioned but it is what it is.

As soon as I finally decided that I’d had enough and started the separation/divorce process, I got so much happier almost immediately. Instead of focusing on my anger and unhappiness and the overall unfairness of it all, I can focus on making the life my kids deserve. And I deserve.

Good luck! It stinks. But you arent the only one going through this. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics