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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This rang a few bells.  Is this you, OP?

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1174345.page

If so, it sounds like the dynamic has been a sh*t show for a while.  The SIL in that older thread was asked to do a lot of elder care, almost tricked into it and the FIL treated her pretty terribly. I can see why she’d be stressed and over it.[/quote]

op here - yes! That was me. Hopefully this thread won’t get deleted now because I’ve posted about my inlaws and their dynamic in the past. I think Jeff wants threads to continue rather than create new ones …

But yes, there’s multiple dynamics here. The SIL in that post is not the biological daughter, she married my BIL (my husbands brother) and they all live together.

My other SIL who is the daughter of MIL has taken FMLA and lives down the road. [/quote]
Well, that is one heck of a dynamic your DH’s family has (just read the other thread). No wonder you’re exhausted and frustrated. DH is probably falling into old habits as he’s facing the loss of his mother, his Dad is being secretive and weird, and his brother is checked out (giving SIL a pass).

All you can do is offer your emotional support to DH while also having a CTJ regarding what’s realistically doable without endangering your livelihoods. Then DH can let his family know.

The signs are bleak, OP, the trip is probably off the table. Review your cancellation terms and see what/when you can cancel. [/quote]

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