Reply to My sister and BIL want me to ask my husband to get their son a lucrative job

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[quote=Anonymous]I think you’re a bad person because you didn’t help him with internships long before graduation.

Why are you dragging your feet so much? This is YOUR nephew—and he’s also your husband’s nephew as long as you’re married. Your attitude makes both of you look bad.

In a very basic level you know this is exactly how the world works. You live a comfortable life because of who you know-your husband.

You have the chance to give your nephew a leg up in the world by sharing your contacts, but you’re choosing not to. Maybe I’m reading too much into this but it sounds like you’re desperate to cling to the idea that some people are simply inherently deserving of wealth and others are not. That mindset makes your place in your husband’s world feel more deserving instead of pure chance. It’s probably scary to imagine that if another pretty girl had caught his eye, you could be the one struggling to make ends meet—just like your sister.

If your husband helps your nephew and he fits into your world, it probably confirms how truly random (and unearned) your own place is. That’s true of just about everyone. Your husband can choose to help a random kid who tells a good joke at the country club or help his nephew. It is truly that random.

Merit has nothing to do with who comes out ahead. You of all people know this.

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