Reply to DD’s schoolfriend is being abused by mentally ill sibling

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It’s not that CPS doesn’t care it’s that there is no good solution or alternative. Either the son is removed from the home or the daughter is and then what? One of the kids is put in foster care? The son is institutionalized (which would be very difficult to even find a facility that would take a 9 year old)?

It’s an impossible position for the parents or caseworkers to manage really. The only thing I could see realistically happening is one parent takes each kid and live separately or girl goes to live w someone else  (grandparents, aunt/uncle, close friend’s family) to keep her safe.[/quote]

Not impossible. Find a facility for the 9 year old. [/quote]

Ha ha ha ha.  You have obviously never tried to do this.  My family was in a similar situation.  DD is 3 yrs older than DS.  If the family can afford it, sleep away camp is a nice break during the summer.  There needs to be a safe room in the house.  It makes the most sense for it to be a room that has direct access to a bathroom.  Rages can last hours.  The door needs to be solid wood or steel with a deadbolt on it.  Put a small fridge in the room as well.

CPS is not set up to deal with abuse from children to children or children to parents.  The easiest way to get into RTC is via an IEP.  And it’s not easy.

Boarding school becomes an option in 6th.  Linden Hall in Pa starts in 6th.  The school will give significant FA in circumstances like this.

If the parents are in the ER, they are doing what they can.  There are support groups with parents that have walked this path before.  Those are the most helpful.  I learned how to get my kid admitted to Shepphard Pratt, how to fight for an IEP, who a good fit therapist for my kid would be, about alternative therapy option, etc.  I don’t know how you broach the topic with the parents if they are not asking your opinion or advice.

My daughter knew she could call her best friends mom any time.  That was very helpful for both of us.  Lastly, my marriage did not survive this. But life got much better when there were 2 homes.  It is like having built in respite care.  Again not sure you can make that suggestion.

Overall the situation sucks.  There are no good answers and everything costs way more money than even the average DCUM family had.  Self pay RTC are $12-$15k per month with an average stay of a year.

My friends used to take me out for coffee and just let me talk without judgement.  It helped a lot.[/quote]

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