Reply to Not attractive enough for the men I am attracted to

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Not attractive enough for the men I am attracted to"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]If you're using apps to date, well, stop. They're all about appearance and how soon people can get into bed. Yes, there are unicorns out there seeking actual relationships, but many of those still are focused only on giving chances to people who tick certain boxes re: looks. OP, if you are relying on online dating, you're always going to feel you don't have the "right" looks because looks is THE initial criterion there.

Instead: Do things YOU actually like and want to do, get involved with organizations of people who share those values you claim you want, volunteer, participate, join stuff. Do it [i]because you would anyway[/i], and because you value the idea of book club or volunteer group or church or hiking club or whatever. Your actual personality and interests will come through there. Sure, it takes longer than a quick online dating hookup, but the quality difference is vast. Better to take longer and find someone who knew you as a person first, than to put yourself out there knowing it's looks alone (separated from any real knowledge of you as a person) that potential dates see first. Source? Me and DH, my best friend and her fiance, my sister-in-law and her great new BF....all met through community engagement, volunteering or organziations we were in.

I know you're getting a lot of specific advice about looks, surgery, working out, and that's all OK but be sure, before you go under the knife, that you're not seeing flaws that aren't as bad as you believe them to be. And think about whether you'd want to grow old together with a man who valued looks so much you'd possibly need to keep up the hair dye, cosmetic surgery, etc. as you and he aged, even if it wasn't advisable....

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics