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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you at a loss because it feels irresponsible to spend the money or would spending the money actually jeopardize needs like food and shelter? To me this is what money is for so you can have permission to do it if everyone going + paying for in laws + paying for a sitter is what you feel is right. If it takes a few months to replace the savings, it's okay.

This is meant supportively because this seems like why you may feel torn. I'm sorry for your loss either way.[/quote]

I am at a loss about all of this. In addition of the grief of losing her, it's a larger situation: Dh's grandpa is still alive and with dementia. We've been dealing with that, a fall for grandma, then surgery and hospitalization for the past month, and dh and fil just both went last month because of it and spent time dealing with it all. So it's one piece among many and there will be more expenses coming, not to mention figuring care for grandpa which isn't done yet as this is all happening at once. I am also concerned about in-laws and their support going forward since they cannot afford a hotel or rental car for a few days. Dh is absolutely going, it's just a lot to deal with and on our mind beyond the funeral. The family situation is hard beyond finances as well so it's not going to be a celebration of life and just a very hard time, which feels so wrong since she truly was a wonderful woman. [/quote]

I’m sorry for your loss and I totally understand why you are feeling conflicted as to how to handle this. Since your in-laws are struggling with the loss it might very well be a comfort to them to have their grandchildren there.  [/quote]

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