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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You make the decision to let it go. Realize that they are human and make mistakes. And sometime those mistakes hurt us. But, you survived the hurt. And they have obviously realized how they hurt you, and hopefully learned from it.

But at some point every human will hurt another human that you are emotionally close to. Sometimes the hurt is enough to sever ties. Other times, you need to acknowledge their humanity and make the decision to move on from it.

I have a best friend who is like a brother to me. We had been best friends for 17 years. About 10 of those years we talked 5-7 times a week. But at that time, we probably talked once a week. I was going though a really really bad depression. But I always sounded up beat (I always do when I'm depressed). And I told him I was depressed, but it's hard to understand just how bad it was based on my outward demeanor.

And I stopped calling him back. He'd call and leave a message. And I would not call him back. After a few times, he just stopped calling. It hurt so much that he just abandoned me that way. We were so close and he could just walk away.

After 2 years, once I was getting better, I reached out to him. And we talked about what happened. He thought me not calling him back was a sign I wanted to be left alone. And he was sad that I pushed him away. I was hurt that he wasn't there during my worst times.

I could've walked away after that. But I chose not to. He realized his mistake. And apologized. And I really missed him and our friendship. So not only did I forgive him, I let it go. His mistake was only one part out of a million other parts that make him up.

And I'm so glad I did. In the past 15 years since we reconnected, he's helped me through so many things. He was my emotional rock when I lost my parents in a way DH couldn't be. (BFF is gay, so no romantic feelings. DH is my rock in other ways, just not in emotional things like grief)

OP- if you really want to repair your heart from the hurt, you remind yourself that they are human, but it's worth it to you to move past it. You focus on all they ways they enrich your life. [/quote]

So did you apologize to him as well? He didn't abandon you. You abandoned him. You ghosted him then gaslighted him by making him feel like it was his fault. That's abusive behavior on your part. This friend deserves a big apology and for you to express your appreciation for taking you back. [/quote]

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