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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]MIL lives about two miles away and is always finding little reasons to stop by, things like, can she drop off muffins she made, can she swing by and deliver some soup she made, is it ok if she stops by and says hello to our children. Mind you, we do plan weekly or at least every other week visits, so she sees us. If we say it’s not a good time, or can we try for tomorrow, she gets upset and takes it as a personal affront, complains the muffins won’t be fresh, etc, or claims she won’t come in and will just drop it on the porch, and then lingers when we don’t come out. It’s so awkward. Is there a better way to handle this without hurting feelings? [/quote]

Jesus C this place never ceases to amaze. She wants to randomly stop by with muffins and soup. The nerve. You are a  sick puppy, OP. So is the PP who says, "Learn not to care about her hurt feelings." You are both damaged goods. [/quote]

Not OP, but I sympathize. Between 4:30pm and 8:30pm I often have multiple pick-ups, car pools, and activities. I am putting dinner on the table, reviewing what came out of unpacked backpacks, asking kids to practice instruments, checking homework, and making sure everyone has the sports equipment or special item for the next day’s school presentation. It is like a well choreographed dance and l literally do not have time to stand and chat for 15 min to say thank you for the muffins. I have a feeling MIL has been told multiple times that evenings are not a convenient time to stop by and is choosing not to listen. As long as OP is polite and firm, it is not her job to cater to MIL’s feelings. MIL is being rude and selfish by choosing not to listen and then pout.

OP. - your MIL is lonely. The way I fixed this with my own parents is to give them a job or set a fixed time to see them. When my kids were little they would pick them up from school and take them to swim lessons once a week and I’d have dinner ready when they got home. Now the kids are older, we have to change it up each season based on sports schedules, but I set a schedule and then can plan around it - like pizza after sports practices on Tuesday for the next 6 weeks. [/quote]

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