Reply to Can I declare a moratorium on cooking?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to have a come to Jesus talk with your husband about his attitude. In our house whichever parent didn't cook dinner thanks the other one at some point during the meal for making it for us. We want the kids to learn to appreciate when someone is putting in effort for us. [/quote]

+1 My DH has never done this with cooking (and he splits cooking duties with me), but he pulled this crap with travel and activities, which I plan 100% of. You expect kids to sometimes be ungrateful and whiny, but the goal of both parents should be to cure them of these habits by demonstrating better manners. I hit a similar wall to OP regarding travel when it just felt like no matter what I did or how much I tried to cater to their preferences, everyone was always complaining about something. A dynamic I especially resented was that the kids would complain about aspects of a trip that were designed to meet DH's preferences, and then DH would complain about aspects of a trip that were meant for the kids. Meanwhile, I sometimes felt like no aspect of our vacations were meant to meet my needs even though I'm the one planning them.

I had several big conversations with my DH about this and made it clear to him that if he couldn't grow the eff up and find a way to go along and get along on vacations with young kids, then the next vacation would be he and the kids on their own while I stayed home and caught up on sleep and work. He was resistant at first but came around. I think he was reverting to his own behavior during childhood family trips and was treating our kids like siblings instead of realizing that he's the grown up and needs to act like one. I think this tendency can happen a lot with men when their wives are in authority positions -- they don't know how to support that so they just become an extra child to manage. Very annoying![/quote]

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