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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If teachers are not reporting any problems, then it could be that this is a parenting issue. I hate to kick you while you're down, but is it possible your behavior is contributing to their outbursts? Diagnosis of most behavioral disorders requires evidence from multiple environments. If the only problem is the home, then the good news is that it might be fixable!

What kinds of strategies and techniques have you tried? Can you get a parenting coach for yourself?[/quote]

Yes maybe. In many ways they are closer to my husband, because they are more alike. When they get angry at him, he throws it back at them. It’s a big chaotic screaming match. It sends me into shutdown mode. Same thing happens when my kids start screaming at me and then I need a day to recover.

I have tried many strategies and techniques but I honestly can’t remember right now. I’m in shutdown mode because I got screamed at today. I think I just need to get away for a while. [/quote]

Different poster here.  It could also be that your kids know they can't get away with certain behavior at school and they are more comfortable at home (and thus worse behavior).  The good news is that they're comfortable at home, though I know myself this is cold comfort when you're living what you describe.  There is no way it is healthy for anyone for your kids and husband to have screaming matches.  Try working with your husband on more positive approaches to parenting.  it sounds like he needs a parenting class.  Maybe you could go to one together.  Google things like "impact of screaming on children."  Help him see it is very detrimental to your kids for him to scream at them.[/quote]

The kids say they don’t mind my husband screaming at them. In a way, it’s almost like they like it because he is matching their energy and they feel validated or more normal for feeling so out of control. It’s me who minds. It’s their normal. [/quote]

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