Reply to Best living situation for barely mobile 72 year old

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What was the house like the last time you went in? Was there something that happened 10 years ago that made her stop letting you in?

Best case scenario she isn't a hoarder in the classic sense (attached to stuff, can't let go of trash), but has ended up there because of long standing mobility issues that prevent her from doing any housekeeping. Who takes out her trash, etc. if she can't go up and down the stairs? [/quote]

OP here. The house was fine when I last saw it. Cleaner than mine.

We stopped visiting due to issues on our end (kid with SN that made traveling very unpleasant) and her desire to visit us. Until 2020 MIL traveled routinely for work and would visit 3 or 4 times a year. When my husband would travel to her city for work, the office he visited was far enough from her house it wouldn’t make sense for him to stay with her and she would offer to come to him.

So it was like a frog boiling in water- very gradual. Explanations always made sense in the context. Also, DH and his mom are very private people and just don’t talk about stuff in a way that is fundamentally different from my family of origin.

I’m feel a bit overwhelmed and discouraged but it was probably a good wake up call to have before we sit down and talk with MIL. 
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