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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have always defined our parenting style as benign neglect. I see it as the opposite of the overscheduling and helicopter parenting that most parents do here. It is a recipe for more independent self-driven kids. They have done their own laundry from 7 or 8. They get themselves to their practices on public transport. They decide which course to do, which colleges to apply to, whether they needed tutors or not. They often made dinner from a young age.

We have attended their games and would intervene if they were having trouble academically or socially. But they have their own lives and we have ours. Our job is to provide the support they need when they need it, not to micromanage. I think they have turned out pretty well.[/quote].

I could have written this. Except we don't have access to public transport, so we outsource driving.  I did provide my kids cooking classes young and they are responsible for helping with meals.  I view my job as ensuring they have the right resources at the right time and know how to use them.  I intervene only when they need a little nudge or they explicitly ask for help, e.g. my older one asked for SAT prep - she just got her results and they are AMAZING, so she knew what she needed.

....then again I have kids who are extremely self aware and self starters, so maybe I just got lucky with awesome kids.[/quote]

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