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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If it were me I'd get a friend to do it then have the friend resign and get yourself appointed as trustee.  [b]It seems like the only reason you are having difficulty being appointed is this particular lawyer.  [/b]Otherwise,you are not a beneficiary so there is no reason you or your husband couldn't be the trustee.  When your friend resigns you can find more agreeable counsel to represent them.

Alternatively, having a bank as trustee isn't the worst thing in the world.  Many charge about 1% per year fee and it might be worth some peace of mind that MILs surviving relatives cannot accuse you of misappropriation the trust assets.[/quote]

Please disregard this person who is asking you to have a friend violate fiduciary duties. And there is another reason she shouldn’t be trustee. She was not named as one when she could have been. I don’t think any neutral person evaluating this case would have her be a trustee.

I hope her cousin reads these posts and ensures the kids’ money is kept safe for their real needs. [/quote]

OP here.  Who the F are you?  The Trust provides documentation that funds are to be used for the care of the beneficiaries.  In fact this is actually standard.  There's no is being greedy and taking money to spend freely with it.  This has everything to do with supporting our kids.  The one is separate from the other.  My mom wanted to stick it to me because she hated that I stuck with my dad upon their divorce.  That she left her money to my kids should suggest that it really was nothing but her own drama that prevented her from leaving money for private school to my kids outright.  She was alienated from our entire family except this one cousin who she entrusted and whom has no real money and to whom my mom gave money to.  She has no friends and at her funeral the only 4 people who showed up were the ones she gave money to!  So we don't care that we aren't Trustees but we do need someone not court appointed.

All I'm asking for is help in how to go about finding fiduciary but inversely this forum PP do not know either.  Got it![/quote]

I’m an attorney. The reason why you were alienated from your mother is not that relevant. She’s not here to give her version, so your view would be subjective and uncontroverted. No, you won’t be trusted and no, you won’t appoint a trustee. If the trust allows your cousin (whom you’re also not close with) to appoint a contingent trustee, your cousin or her attorney can ask you (or not) for your input.

[/quote]

This. Deal with reality and facts. Make it easy on yourself and your cousin. I have siblings who wasted thousands of their own dollars and then my parents' trust wasted thousands of dollars in response over this kind of thing. You're not in control and your mom made the decision and you need to live with it. Your attorney may not be steering you in the right direction and the stuff about the trust having mistakes in it may or may not matter. Tread carefully. [/quote]

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