Reply to WWYD? Being asked NOT to bring a new spouse and children

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Everyone is invited. You can’t exclude your brothers wife and children. Your nephews are adults. They are welcome, and you would adore for them to come. But that doesn’t mean you’re going to disinvite your brothers wife.

They are adults and need to start acting like adults. Divorce and remarriage is really hard on kids. Holidays make it harder. But the answer is not to get involved in what is, in the end, their own petty hatred of their dads new wife.

My answer changes if his new wife abused these boys as teens or something of course. Abusers get disinvited. [/quote]

She wasn't abusive but she expected acceptance and went out of her way to get them to like her. Expensive gifts, coming to their games, sending them food packages. She really wanted them to like her. She used to cry to our parents, "[b]I do this and I do that, and nothing is ever good enough, they don't even say hello to me[/b]." She would also tell her kids to call them "brother and sisters" and they HATED it, it was so forced and awkward. These kids are tough, they do not budge. On the contrary, their mother is about to remarry and they are friendly with their future stepdad and his DS. [/quote]

Sometimes I feel that way about my own kids! Her expectations were a bit entitled but nothing here suggests the (adult) kids have some moral basis to justify excluding her and her kids. They are welcome not to come, and if that's their stance, that should be fine. OP and grandparents can see them another time.  [/quote]

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